At my whits end. Exhausted from everyday life, and only two "free" days to finish three big projects. Projects that need to be done before we leave for a much needed, long, 'before Christmas vacation.' Why do I have to finish them NOW? We're not leaving for our trip for two more weeks! Well.... the people the projects are intended for are out of town for only two days and they won't be leaving again before Christmas. Some are permanent residents at the moment.
Projects 1 & 2, is something I work on all year. Not one, but I make TWO picture calendars for each set of parents. I work on it all year, gathering pictures and making sure each calendar page has the pictures that took place in those months. On Black Friday, the online platform always has a very good sale. If I can finish by that date, I can ensure delivery before Christmas and get a great deal.
Project 3, a t-shirt quilt I have made for my mother in law. She and my father in law have been "misplaced" for over a year and a half by building their home. They have been living in our basement for that entire time and have only left for full days, three times. During those three times I have been able to cut out the shirts, and simply sew them together. Today, I only need to add batting, add backing, and tie the quilt. Easy right?
Wrong.
I tried to finish the two calendars but the website was down. I was given the spinning circle of doom that lies by saying, "LOADING."
"Okay... " I say to myself, "I'll work on the quilt while I wait for it to tell the truth and ACTUALLY LOAD. "
I pull out the quilted top, I lay it all out and go grab the quilting needles my mom left me. Oldies but goodies. In a very small town you are grateful for things you can't simply go to the store to purchase. This is only my third quilt I've ever made. I've made each quilt with my mom. She is the expert, I just fake it. I call my mom to whine and tell her I am very disappointed she is a snow bird and has left me to do this all on my own. She reassures me that I can do it. I tell her she's a liar and whine some more. She says she's sorry, but not really sorry. That's the first truth she said. We giggle and hang up.
I trudge down to get the needles and yarn. My mom gave me her small stash of quilting needles that are at least 100 years old, (jk, but seriously they've been through it all!) and these needles have resided on a red piece of fabric FOREVER. I grabbed the red piece of fabric that held the precious ancient tools and set out to tie the quilt with yarn. I thread the best looking needle and get to work. OUCH, stuck my finger again with the pin. OUCH! This fabric is HEAVY DUTY! DANG IT BROOKLYN, YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE CHEAP. Sigh... no you shouldn't have, you're grateful you didn't go cheap. You wanted it to be a nice quilt, so suck it up buttercup! Be a Nike ad and,"Just DO IT!" OUCH, this is really hard to get through, OH MY GOSH!! YOU IDIOT! YOU DON'T HAVE MOM'S RUBBER THUMB! (They help you grip the needle and save your fingers) Well, a jar gripper will have to work. PULL!! (remove your jacket and wipe the sweat off of your brow) DANG IT, THIS NEEDLE IS STUCK! You are only four ties in and your fingers are already throbbing, you're such a BABY!
Pitter patter...."MOM!!! WE WANT YOU TO COME PLAY WITH US!" What are you doing? Can I help? Mom, why do you have two bandaids on your fingers?"
"Can you angels do the dishes and pick up dog poop, then watch a movie?"
"Sure mom! Can you play with us when you're done?"
"Yes I can!"
(I HAVE THE BEST OLDER KIDS EVER! Ages 10 & 9, they could obviously see that I was about to lose my mind or cry so they backed away and did their little assignments. BLESS THEM!)
I look down, and the needle is SUPER stuck. I grab a set of needle nose pliers. They must be called "needle nose" to help weaklings like me get NEEDLES through fabric! Ba ha hha. Just kidding, but seriously that was all I could find, and the name gave me the tiniest bit of confidence and hope. I grip it, and PULL! SNAP. I break the needle. I put my head down on the quilt. I take a deep breath, and grab the red fabric holding the other ancient needles. I grab the next best one. It's smaller but it will work, right? Wrong. The yarn won't thread. I try for at least 5-10 minutes just to THREAD IT! I'm DYING! My neck is aching from looking down and concentrating so hard. My pinching throbbing fingers are achy and I'm running out of time and patience. I grab a bigger needle. It looks a little dull, but it threads easily. I push it into the fabric, wait no, it doesn't go through. What? It's not even piercing the fabric?! It's so dull it won't go through ANY OF IT. UGGGHHHHHH!!! I drop the dull needle and thread. I put my hands up as if I'm being held up by a bandit and walk away before I cry. I walk over to my computer and try to reload the calendars. I need to work on SOMETHING that will work! JUST ONE CHECK MARK on my list!
Long story short, I sit down and it won't load. I sign out, I sign in, no luck. I finally break down and use the "support/help" for the website. They walk be through all of the things it could be. We "chat" for over an hour. During that time I am transferred to a "higher up," and have genuinely tried EVERYTHING to get my stupid computer to work. I want to cry because I know I can finish these last four pages in under an hour! I think I stumped them and finally they say, everything is fine on our end. The only thing we haven't tried is you completely restarting your computer. try that and let us know if you have any further questions. I say thank you and apologize for taking so much of their time. (Thank the heavens it's the day after Thanksgiving and we have tons of leftovers! My kids are hungry but are old enough to microwave their own food.) Dad comes home from work and sees me struggling on the computer and the quilt sprawled across the table. At this time I'm surprised I'm not bald from pulling on my poly tail, or my face isn't permanently indented from my fingers constant dragging over my cheeks.
I sigh. I bow my head and I pray. I pray in my heart and pray in my head that this will work. I restart my computer and the miracle happens. It worked. My calendars loaded and I finish them in 30 minutes.
I look over and get up. All of the other quilting needles my mom has are too big or too small. I feel like goldilocks but I really do need the one that is JUST RIGHT. Sigh... After I prayed I feel a little better. I know I grabbed all of the needles from my drawer that my mom gave me, but I better go make sure. I go downstairs, and start sifting through my drawer of odds and ends where I got the needles. I knew there weren't any other needles. The ONLY quilting needles were on the red fabric. Sigh... is this a doomed project? I move some more things around and there on the bottom, in a corner is another needle! It's not too dull and looks barely wide enough for the yarn to pass through. I see another needle that looks smaller but could be a possible extra. (With my luck another one will break.)
I start and the first tie gets stuck. I grab the gripper and pull. Nope, no luck. I grab the pliers and SNAP. These "NEEDLE NOSE" pliers LIED! NO NEEDLES SHOULD EVER BE PULLED WITH THESE THINGS! I want to throw them out the window, but I gently set them down like the mentally strained (or deranged) person I am. I grab my LAST NEEDLE. The one I thought I didn't have, the one that just HAPPENED to be there when I was at my lowest. When I knew there were no other quilting needles in the house. I thread it slowly, and I finish tying in 20 minutes. I pin, sew and finish the outer edge.
Miracles happen every day.
When I went to bed, I knelt down like every other night to say my prayers. I prayed and thanked my Father in Heaven for the day. I thanked Him for my amazing children. I thanked Him for a patient husband. I thanked Him for the kind people who helped me with my computer. I thanked Him for the needle that wasn't there when I grabbed the needles in the first place. I don't know how that needle appeared, but I know for a fact it wasn't there before.
The Lord is mindful of us. He is aware of our needs.
"Hey Brooklyn, I'm still here. You won't recognize it for a few minutes, but you'll see it later. I was always there. Keep going Brooklyn, if you need a needle, I'll find one for you, or I'll help open your eyes to see what you didn't see before. I'm right here, you're doing good. All you had to do was ASK. After you asked, I came. Next time, pray BEFORE you start your stressful projects, then I can help the whole way."
"Brooklyn, you may have been chatting with those people online for over an hour, but they were there to help, just like I am here to help. Did you know that your kindness and appreciation helped THEM? I knew I could count on you to be kind to others when you yourself was struggling and frustrated."
Matt 7:7-8
7. Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
8. For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
